Heartbreak Warfare by Jessica Marin

Author:Jessica Marin [Marin, Jessica]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Jessica Marin
Published: 2018-02-05T18:30:00+00:00

The car ride home is silent as I watch the outside world in a trance. Layla must have sent Robert a text because he is there to greet us when we pull up to my building, his expression somber. They help me out of the car and walk slowly with me to the elevators, the lift up to my floor painfully quiet. As we enter my apartment, I look around as if I am seeing it for the first time, noticing all the things it lacks that didn’t matter before. Can a baby even live here? There are children in the buildings, so clearly I am overreacting.

“Why don’t we have a girls’ day? We can watch movies, eat junk food and have a slumber party!” Robert claps his hand, his voice overly enthusiastic.

“I’m not hungry.” The mere thought of food makes me to want to vomit. “I think I want to be alone, guys.”

“I like the movie idea!” Layla hastily replies.

“Great, let’s pick a movie.” Robert briskly walks over to the TV and turns on Netflix. He starts to flip the movies and laughs. “Oh my gosh, wouldn’t it be funny if we watched ‘Knocked Up’?”

With the look of horror registering on our faces, he immediately stops laughing. “Too soon to make a joke about it?” Robert usually is on point with inserting his comedic comments to lighten the mood. This time he failed.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Layla angrily stalks towards him. “Give me that remote!”

“I’m sorry! I was just trying to lighten the mood. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

“I’m going to go throw up now. I’ll be back. Pick a suspenseful movie.” I retreat to the sanctuary of my bedroom and shut the door as Layla continues to ream Robert on his insensitivity. I go to my bathroom and splash cool water on my face, hoping I’ll wake up from this dream. I dry my face and decide to lay down on the bed. I turn to my side and hug my pillow as tight as I can when my vision starts to blur with the tears that need to be released as my new reality sinks in.

I am going to have a baby…. a baby I never thought I would have.

I am going to be in charge of another human being’s life.

I am going to be a single mom.

I lose the concept of time as I cry my sorrows into my pillow. I feel the bed shift and strong arms wrap around me as Layla lays down in front of me and holds me. I feel hands rubbing my hair away from my face and realize Robert has gotten behind me. Having both friends here to comfort me makes me not feel so alone and my tears start to subside. I try to gain control of my breathing and eventually the three of us lay in silence, holding onto each other.

“What am I going to do, guys?” I break the silence by communicating my thoughts out loud.

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